Catch 22

In fashion, shopping on January 27, 2011 at 10:03 am

According to ‘research’ released yesterday, the average woman has 22 items in her wardrobe that she has never, or rarely worn, and never will wear. Like, I suspect, many other women, felt the need to investigate this and hotfooted it upstairs to check out my wardrobe and find out if I was – gasp – merely an average woman.

Aha: instantly I spotted a pair of smart grey trousers that I really like, but that I made the mistake of buying when I was wearing flat shoes, so that I have probably worn them three times. I’ve removed them and given them to my mum, she’s six inches shorter than me and more inclined to alter clothes than me.

A backless Mango dress, one of three I bought for a Christmas party in 2009 and felt massively self conscious in. On closer inspection, it’s actually lovely, so perhaps it was more to do with the very unpleasant company I was in – I seem to recall leaving said party at the earliest possible opportunity to escape. I’m keeping it for now.

A long red Whistles dress, cut to make me look voluptuous and hourglass, but in reality makes me look like the biggest pear you ever did see… duly consigned to the charity shop bag.

Two pinstripe skirts – can’t recall the last time I wore either – so one for me, one for the bag.

Two (very expensive) TM Lewin shirts in black and purple,, bought during a month of hefty pitches. It’s been at least 18 months since I wore them… but I can’t bring myself to get rid of them due to the sheer cost. I might seek the services of stylist Emma to get more wear out of them. Come to think of it, the four suits taking up valuable space haven’t been worn in months, but I’m loath to dispose of them and then have to spend another £200 when a crucial pitch arises.

I’m beginning to see why I have so many clothes and yet always grumble ‘I have nothing to wear…’

The denim skirt that I wouldn’t dream of wearing at home, but seems to become a staple piece of holiday-wear when it comes to something to pull on over my bikini… maybe one more holiday?

I have (had) 11 pairs of jeans, only five of which I ever wear… and any number of identical, albeit in a rainbow of colours, cami tops.

After stashing my handful of clothes – 16 in all – in a bag I cast my mind back just four months when I moved house… I seem to recall giving three sacks of rarely worn clothes to charity then too, along with six pairs of shoes.

But then I opened a whole new can of worms. Am I dull?

On closer inspection, I do seem to lack imagination at times. Apart from a few exceptions, I do seem to have a whole host of tops, all identical, in four different colours, rack upon rack of jumpers with the same detailing but in myriad shades, and tons of forgiving tunic tops to wear with leggings and jeans.

That explains why I always feel a bit blah, a bit dull. The really ‘wow’ clothes in my wardrobe – and there are tons of them, gorgeous dresses in different shades, different styles, different fabrics, different lengths, aren’t really everyday wear. But that’s my decision – when did it stop Miss Carrie Bradshaw?

Hmmm… Maybe I need to reinvent myself and become The Girl With The Great Dress. Even if it is only Thursday.

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